How is it possible for so many people online and over the internet, whether is it through twitter, instagram or some other social net working site think I am this drop dead gorgeous girl. A “rare beauty”, a “smile that lights up a room”.

My pictures are deceitful, because they don’t look like me. At all.

I don’t know how but I just know how to make myself look decent in a picture. And then in real life, I am such a disappointment, a let down. Do you know how that makes me feel? But I am still going to do it. I am still going to work my good angles to make myself look as good as possible in a picture because I would rather be accepted somewhere than no where.

I have this app called Plenty of Fish. Some of you may use it, or have heard of it, or don’t know it. But it is kind of this dating app? I use this app for my own selfish reasons. Tons of guys each day message me expressing to me how beautiful I am. And for that split second while I read their messages I really do feel pretty. But it is so disheartening to know that the girl behind the screen doesn’t look like that.

She is just a normal, unoriginal and mediocre chick who happens to take good pictures of herself and yearns for compliments, even if it is over the internet.

sorry. I just really needed to get this off my chest.